Articles >Focus on 3 “Outcomes of Success” for 2007

Focus on 3 “Outcomes of Success” for 2007

I have to say I have been a goal setter from a very young age. My dad even encouraged me to reach goals and would bribe me to reach them. For instance if I got straight ‘A’s in Grade 8 he would buy me a dirt bike. Since I grew up on a farm in Saskatchewan a dirt bike was a much coveted reward. Needless to say I did get straight ‘A’s in Grade 8 AND I got the dirt bike.

Don’t ask me about Grades 9 through 12 though!
The challenge with learning this strategy around setting goals is that if I didn’t reach goals as an adult I would get very down on myself and give up.
Now as an entrepreneur who has been self employed since 1994 I have finally figured out that goals are not necessarily the answer. Typical goal setting often fails due to the fact that we weren’t ready or willing to change the behavior before setting the goal. Or we make a flat statement such as “I want to lose weight”.

Hence we set ourselves up for failure.

I had lunch today with a dear friend who is a psychologist in private practice (I know how lucky am I to have a friend who can tell me if I am being logical or not!) We were talking about what it takes to change behavior because we had both seen the movie with Al Gore titled “An Inconvenient Truth” and we agreed that the movie needed to tell us more about what is being done to save the environment and have good news stories about groups and individuals who are making positive changes towards this effort.

Anyway, I digress we were talking about goal setting and changing behaviors and we all set ourselves up for disappointment. She gave an example of a client who thought he wanted to quit smoking. Notice I said thought he wanted not he really truly did want to quit.

The distinction in actually doing anything different is right in the words, want, need or have to.

If we WANT to do something with every fiber of our being only then will we actually DO anything different.

The cool thing is that my friend’s approach was to not get him to change anything. Basically she challenged him to agree that he doesn’t want to quit at all and that he really enjoys smoking and that he just feels ‘obligated’ to quit because of others opinions and because it is a new year!

How refreshing! The truth. When we admit we aren’t ready to change something then that is our clear sign that it is not a goal!

Here’s what I suggest we do for 2007 in regards to planning. I recommend the following:

1. Rather than setting goals focus on 3 outcomes you would like to achieve by the end of 2007. By outcomes I mean focus on daily actions rather than unreachable goals. For example if you have a goal of a better relationship with your partner change it to an outcome of “By the end of this year my relationships is deeper, richer and more intimate and I will achieve this by focusing daily on what is working, what I love about him or her and doing loving things”.
2. Put your 3 outcomes in a very visible place within your office or car. State them as mantras every single day. Remind yourself of your outcomes whenever you feel yourself responding in a negative or stressful way. Become mindful of who you want to become by the end of the year.
3. Relax. If losing weight really is something you are committed to doing then set your outcome as “By the end of the year I am healthier, feel better and look fantastic in my clothes. I will do this by committing to support in a healthier lifestyle by hiring a nutritionist and a fitness trainer”

Do you see the difference in being outcome focused versus just setting a goal? Somehow stating that we want to lose weight, stop smoking, exercise more, have better relationships are all wishful thinking statements not true focused behavior changes.

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