Newsletters > January 2005

Issue: January 2005

5 Reasons Why Setting News Goals Can Fail

It's been about three weeks since we rang in the New Year and we began to detox from the drink and chocolate. We may have found ourselves reflecting on the past year and its events and we may have resolved to change the very things we had trouble changing in previous years.

Which brings us to a question: Why is it so hard to stick to those darned resolutions or goals that we set every year?

There are five reasons why New Year's resolutions or goals fail and here they are:

1. Aiming in the dark
2. No true commitment to the goal
3. Too much focus on the end result
4. It gets too hard
5. Too many goals

1. Aiming in the dark

We can't hit a target if we don't know where we are aiming. Often the goals we set in the New Year are more about wishful thinking than true commitment to achieve an outcome. For example, if we set a goal to run a marathon but haven't strapped on the runners to take a walk around the block in the last year what makes us think that we would actually follow through now? Many goals fail simply because they miss the mark-because there was no mark clearly established in the first place. This is not to say that we couldn't run the marathon, but we would have to have a clear plan in place about how we were going to do it, measure it and stick to it, which takes us to the next reason.

2. No true commitment to the goal

Often we will pick goals or resolutions that we think others would approve of, such as quitting smoking or losing weight. We have to get down-and-dirty with ourselves and be really honest by asking ourselves questions like:

• Do I really want to quit smoking or would I be doing it for someone else?
  
• Am I willing to follow through with what it takes to lose the weight?

It's important to test goals. When you set goals, check out your response to each one. Do you feel excited by it? Does your body feel energized when you think of achieving the goal, or do you suddenly feel exhausted by the amount of work it will take to get there? Ask yourself: Whose goal is this?

Don't forget that putting a New Year's date on an important goal, like quitting smoking, can put undue stress and pressure on you that could sabotage the goal. Instead, choose a date that is not related to any special event and then you have another reason to celebrate every year.

3. Too much focus on the end result

A certain amount of work is involved in achieving anything worthwhile. There is no way to bypass that reality. When we focus too intently on what life will be like once we accomplish a goal we forget to enjoy the process of getting there. We may delay reward until the goal is achieved or we may really beat ourselves up when we slip up or get off-track. It is important to be committed to the fundamental shift that needs to happen mentally as we progress, and we need to honor our steps towards the overall goal. For example, if you miss a day of training in a new exercise regime, you could acknowledge that you chose not to exercise that day and that you will get back to it the next day instead of feeling badly. When you do follow through on the elements that contribute to the goal, come up with ways to reward yourself and motivate you to continue forward.

4. It gets too hard

Once we get started we realize that we need a high level of motivation to achieve our goals. This is usually when most of us give up entirely and revert to our old ways. The best way to make it through this phase is to have a coach or buddy support us through these phases.

Decide in advance who your partner in reaching your goals is going to be and rely on that person to talk about the process, review progress and cheer you on towards the end reward. Choose someone who you are accountable to, and to whom you must report your progress. Regular pep talks from people you trust work wonders in this crucial phase.

5. Too many goals

We over-zealous types often sabotage ourselves by setting too many goals in the first place. What we focus on is what we will attract. If we have ten pretty hefty things we want to achieve in a year we are setting ourselves up for half-efforts and diminished interest as we realize we have set ourselves up for failure. I can just hear all of the type As reading this right now and saying, "But I NEED to set lots of big goals! That's what keeps me energized." As a recovered type A and an overachiever myself I used to believe in this myth too. The truth is that once I narrowed down my true-to-my-heart goals and outlined the plan, support and steps I needed to take I found the process much more enjoyable and also began achieving BIG singular goals versus failing at many BIG goals.

There are now many forms of support on the Web to help us achieve our resolutions and goals. Check out:

www.weightwatchers.com (it offers online support for weight loss)
www.bodyforlife.com (you can download reports and records for tracking progress)
www.coachfederation.org (for any type of goal support, find a coach)
www.quitnet.com (an online group who have or are trying to quit smoking)
www.organizetips.com/goal.htm (sample of a goal planning worksheet)

You always have a choice and the conscious brain can only hold one thought at a time. Choose a positive thought!

Cheryl's Tip For Bureaus & Planners

When hiring a speaker for your event you will increase your event's success with the following tips:

1. Ensure you have a specific plan or outcome for your event such as a theme, purpose and the end result when its over.
   
2. Establish a budget for the entire event and for your speaker(s)
   
3. Ask for references from your speaker in the form of testimonial letters, speakers bureaus or client referrals.
   
4. View the speakers video or better yet go see them in person to ensure that their style, message and delivery will be a 'fit' for your event.
   
5. Communicate often with your speaker to ensure all details in regards to the event are known well in advance and complete a pre-program questionnaire for the speaker with all pertinent information about the event and other speakers on the program.

You are the expert at planning the events and a great speaker will be your partner in ensuring the whole thing is a raving success!

Cheryl's Recommendations

Books:

The Art of Possibility ~ Benjamin Zander	From Good to Great ~ Jim Collins

Back to Newsletters Index

The Bold Leader Blog | Are You A Bold Leader Quiz | Keynotes & Seminars | Watch Video | Contact Us | Meet Cheryl | Why Work With Cheryl | Keynotes & Seminars | Coaching & Consulting | Coaching & Consulting | Shop For Bold | Schedule | Bureaus & Planners | Partial Client List | Testimonials | Newsletters | Articles | Cheryl Recommends | Contact Us | Home